I sit here at the keyboard at a loss for words...This is a journal...this is where I share with you my artistic notions and creative process...It has been almost exactly a year since I received the blow that my life and paradigms would all have to change... And I have had the luxury of just enjoying art in the past and now I feel all this pressure and avoidance. Ugh! It has to stop. I do not have the assurance of habit on my side when it comes to painting...that ability or NEED to do it no matter how I feel. But music is something I just do...NO MATTER WHAT...I do not know why...I really think it is habit. And so, as I try to face all my